3 years ago, I attended a seminar/camp that touches something close to my heart. Prior to that event, I was feeling very excited and was looking very forward to making lots of friends over there. However, on the first day, I found out that most of them have already known each other before hand and thus, were already in “cliques”. I tried to make friends with them but due to my nature (I am very shy around strangers!) and my inability to effectively communicate with them, I felt alienated throughout the whole event though the knowledge gained from the seminar was invaluable.
Furthermore, coming from a Chinese- speaking family, I was inadequately exposed to English and have always admired my friends who are able to present their ideas to many people and speak very well on the spot. I feel jittery standing in front of so many people and my presentation will always be punctuated with lots of redundant pauses and ermm. Don’t they feel nervous standing in front of so many people with so many pairs of eyes staring back at them? How could they be able to articulate clearly and organise their ideas so well if given a topic on the spot?
Hence, I was determined to take a module that can improve my communication skills during my Uni years as I can see the importance of effective communication skills especially when we step into the working life. The ability to “sell” ourselves to the interviewers in order to get the job and once we get the job, we will still need to communicate effectively with our colleagues of different cultural backgrounds and presenting ideas to them. Moreover, effective communication is not only much needed at work, it is also equally important at home or between friends as I believe to be able to communicate effectively is a life long skill that each of us should practice.
It’s time for me to step out of my comfort zone and I know I still have a long way to go, but I really hope after this 13 weeks, I will be able master this skill. Let’s do this together! J
Hi Cuishan!
ReplyDeleteI understand how you felt during the course which you were looking forward to attending it and making new friends so much, only to find that most people have already known each other prior to the course, and are already in their own cliques. I had the same experience too! Once, I took part in this camp and was really looking forward to meeting new friends, but all I got was the feeling of being really out of place and awkward. However, I realised that, they were probably in their own cliques because they preferred talking to people they already knew, and felt shy talking to strangers too! I took the first step and started a conversation with someone else, and things just got better after that :)
Effective communication skills are indeed essential and useful for survival in the workplace and society. Let's work hard together these 13 weeks!
Cheers,
Qianwen
Hey Cuishan,
ReplyDeleteSometimes we are afraid to make the first move to speak to others, for fear that they judge us and have negative impressions of us. But as Ms Lim mentioned during our class on Monday, people have started forming impressions about us within seconds after looking at us! Pulling yourself away from others could have already allowed others to form an impression about you.
However, as much as we may want to take the first step out of our comfort zones, others must be receptive towards us as well. So I feel that you should not blame yourself for not being able to make new friends during that course! After all, you did try (:
Being from different backgrounds can influence the different aspects in which we are good or weak in. Nobody is perfect; we all have strengths and weaknesses. Don't lose heart just because others are better than you, instead learn from them and find ways to keep improving yourself (: I am sure there are kind souls out there willing to give you a hand!
I believe most of our intentions of choosing this course are similar, we all want to improve ourselves and be able to communicate with others better! So don't be afraid, we will all make mistakes together, and we will all learn from those mistakes together (:
Siyuan
Hi Cuishan,
ReplyDeleteI have had similar experiences as you have described earlier in your post. Sometimes, I would even blame myself for not having the courage to be as outspoken or as articulate as some of my friends. Thus, I believe taking this module must have been a challenging first step.
I agree with you that effective communication is a must in this dog-eat-dog world and I believe that with hard work and adequate effort in place, we will all be able to equip ourselves with the necessary communication skills that would bring us much advantage in the work force.
I look forward to getting to know you better and hopefully, we will be able to help each other out in attaining effective communication! =)
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHi Cui Shan,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I like your the way you put a cartoon picture at the start of your blog post! It attracts me and makes me feel interested on what you wrote in your post. =)
Thanks for sharing your experience and your thoughts about communication.I understand how you feel not confident on presenting yourself to others, especially to strangers - just like me! Maybe it is due to our nature that we tend to judge too much on ourselves through the eyes of other people, making us feel less confident in ourselves! I guess sometimes we will just have to relax and present ourselves as who we are, then learn from those that are able to express themselves confidently.
Well it is not too late for us to learn and train ourselves now. Let's prepare to face the challenges together! =)
Hi Cuishan, I am from Chinese speaking family too, and very often I find it more comfortable to speak in Chinese rather than in English. I think this can be a blunder in communication because many people in Singapore assume English as the primary communication medium, especially in a university such as NUS. Therefore I think it is important to learn to communicate in English along with proper skills because sometimes I find the original meaning of my idea is slightly distorted when i try to put it in English as I could not find the proper word.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading through the comments, I think most of us take up this module with a reason of our own and have our own expectations as well. And I find our goals quite similar to each other's :-) let's work together for the rest of the semester!
Dear Cuishan,
ReplyDeleteI do agree with you that if we do not possess some effective communication skills, it would be difficult for us to "promote" ourselves especially when we are looking for a job.
However, I do feel that it can be trained. While some people are born with charismatic personality which allows them lead a team/speak in the public, the communication skills that they have, can be possessed by any other individuals. We might not be very articulate and outspoken, but we could practice from today onward.
So let's practice and improve together throughout this semester! :)
Tschüs!
Mei